Whisper to me in blue paternal words –
Rosebud red softness for your firm desire.
I won’t resist your masculine pressure –
I’m your lipstick boy and will stoke your fire.
Be careful with my heart it’s so fragile;
Too many times lovers let it shatter.
I was never enough for their desires;
My fidelity to them didn’t matter.
So many rumours and poisonous lies;
I hear the deceit without much surprise.
These pigs trashing me couldn’t stand in my shoes –
Know how I breathe or see life through my eyes.
Never a moment to breathe or reflect;
An overcrowded land of so much noise.
Lost within the land that God abandoned –
Streets swarmed with the virus of too much choice.
I believed when he said I am wicked;
A lifetime of held breath and tortured lies.
There appeared no way to open my heart –
I mixed my words with smoke just to survive.
A satisfied stallion snug in his bed of seduction;
How many had felt his ardent thrusts?
Dents and scratches etched into the wall revealed his passion.
When you squirm atop me, I still hear him whisper ti amo.
Your enchanting words of love enslaved me –
Insincere praise enchained my fragile heart.
You caressed my absence of self-belief –
Your embrace and first kiss were just the start.
My heart believed all your obvious lies;
The fear of isolation took control.
You thought I didn’t know but my eyes could see –
You riding my friends almost broke my soul.
In stillness, I travelled – beyond my mind;
Lured by His honey words and sinful bribes.
Within the great walls of Hell I found Him;
And I turned Him toward my lustful vibes.
I felt his hand grope my skin –
His fear burned my soul.
I screamed into the darkness –
His scent stopped my death.
I saw the world through your eyes;
You shone through every smile.
You swam deep inside my Welsh blood –
I heard you with each word I spoke.